is deeply in love. And yes, will always be. insyaAllah. =)

ya Allah. betul ke pilihan yg aku buat ni...

how to be romantic

here's a list of things wish their boyfriends would do. okay guys, here's ur chance to b the most romantic bf ever!

1. send flower to her place/office (for no reason at all!) flowers anywhere r good!

2. just a card is fine! women love cards. make one urself

3. give her little gifts or surprises. little things mean the most

4. make eye contact with her as much as possible

5. tell her she is beautiful, not hot. most girls would rather be called beautiful

6. plan a perfect 'date'. something other than the cliche dinner and movie

7. tell her u love her (but only if u really do). write her love notes too

8. be sensetive to her needs

9. make her feel special around her friends and other people

10. make her birthday special

11. plan something big for Valentine's day

12. make her feel like she is the most important thing in the world to u

13. always listen to her as much as u can, even though it is about girl stuff

14. always pay attention to her. a little ignorance will make her feel upset or even hurt her

tips: remember little things she says in conversations with u and bring them up later. she'll be flattered that u would remember.

never ignore her, for she will leave u before u can say 'but wait. dont go!'

*this is just a little help for tt someone.

monolog

i know i've make myself sound demanding. tak bersyukur. mengada2. byk songeh.

but is it wrong? to ask just for a little.. appeciation, and recognition?

if u really think 'this thing' is true, why want to keep it as a BIG DIRTY SECRET?

dear liver

dear liver.

if u want things to work this time, please be stiff. and hard. and dont cry.

u may try to coat urself with ferum. or immersed urself in diamond. or just let it be cirrhosis.

*cirrhosis liver is hard, isn't it?*

just like a star

just like a start across my sky

just like an angel off the page

you have appeared to my life

feel like i'll never be the same

just like a song in my heart

just like oil on my hands

oh, i do love u

still i wonder why it is

i don't argue like this

with anyone but u

we do it all the time

blowing out my mind

u've a this look i cant describe

u make me feel like i'm alive

when everything else is fade

without a doubt u'r on my side

heaven has been away too long

can't find the words to write this song

oh, your love

still i wonder why it is

i don't argue like this

with anyone but u

we do it all the time

blowing out my mind

i have come to understand

the way it is, it's not secret anymore

cause we've been through that before

from tonight i know that you're the only one

i've been confused and in the dark, now i understand

i wonder why it is

i don't argue like this

with anyone but u

i wonder why it is

i won't let my guard down

for anyone but u

we do it all the time

blowing out my mind

just like a star across my sky

just like an angel off the page

u have appeared to my life

feel like i'll never be the same

just like a song in my heart

just like oil on my hands

*this song is from Corinne Bailey Rae.

this song sound sweet. n the lyric is quite meaningful to me.

i guess.

please Allah...

previously, i always pray to HIM in my every prayer.

i want a good man, who loves me and i love him. who understand me and may accept me as i am. who is 'sekufu' with me. the man who YOU bless to be with me.

HE granted my wishes. i met a man who is exactly like what i prayed.

and since then, my prayer has changed.

Please Allah. If he is the one that YOU choose for me and the one that YOU blessed to be with me, please make things run smoothly and make the marriage easier for us. if that is what YOU think best for us. But if he is not the one, please show me YOUR guidance, and make me redha with it. cause i only want a relationship that YOU bless.

i dun know. our relationship is nice, and sweet. but it also come along with thorns. i am truely happy. but at the same time, i also feel sad. and i cry, a lot.

Please Allah. i really need u.

what a terrible day

i have a terrible day yesterday. hari yg sangat2 menguji keimanan.

it was started with half of a day at KMAM (pusat rawatan air, Semambu). i had a bad tudung senget benget all the way, which i already noticed my tudung pattern usually indicates my mood. (u wear serabai when u mess up, u look good when u r happy. isn't it?). plus, i only listened to the half of the lecture, and the other half i spent with a gud morning sleep.

after that, i hurried to KOM with the intention to email my banner design to the company at KL> it shud be sent by today. by hook or by crook. coz if not, it wud delay everything. and it shud reach them, and they have to reply, and then i need to bank in the money to them. all these process shud be done before 4 o'clock in order for me to get the banner send back her by tomorrow. i guess, i tried to attach the file more than 1000 times. dari musolla ke library, dari kom library bukak balik lattop, n last2 use both terus utk attach. sume tak berjaya. dah compress pon sama jer. padahal lagi setengah jam nak kol 4. rasa nak nangis sgt time tuh. punya la lama nak tunggu sampai mmg tido je kat meja library, pastuh bgn balik tgk file still takleh attach... tatau nak ckp apa. sgt stress.

last2 give up. gi ana cafe, nak amik makanan order. tgk2 tadek. pastuh baru kak ana tuh cakap order tuh cancel sbb ikan tadek. time tuh dah pukul 6. aku pun tatau aku buat muka apa ntah time tuh. but sure2 muka kesian, pasrah, whatever punya type. mmg pk, lantakla. xyah makan je la. nasib kak ana kesian, dia cakap nak tak nasi goreng cina. msk on the spot. layan je la walau tak bape suka pon.

sbb geram nak nangis sgt smbil menunggu file yg tak attach2 tu, tulis la status kat fb "rasa nak nangis. sob". but of all the people yg asked and responded, dia tak tanya pon. =( after meeting, dia msg pon tanya dah makan ke belom, nak mintak tolong ganti gi meeting health camp malam esok. ermmm.... ntahla. apa2 je la. dah tak larat dah nak makan ati. dahla tgh start cuti2 mesia nih, baik abaikan jer. mungkin dia tak perasan kot kat fb tuh... (ye la sgt kan...) *mak izzah pesan, kalau nak duduk, jgn tinggi sgt. nanti kalau jatuh sakit.

at the end of the day, about 12 midnite, someone yg sgt kurg asam telah mengeluarkan my baju from mesin basuh sebelum dirinse. n when i came, half of my clothes siap jatuh2 atas lantai lagi. pasrah dah. angkat satu2 bilas balik satu2. perah balik semua satu2.

ujiannya.

n lastly, bengkak jugak mata aku menangis.

p/s: wondering whyla my air mata become soo murah lately...

opening remark!

finally, now i move to the new deco-blogging!

i'm not really sure wut's the reason i suddenly became overexcited to restart 'this thing' from the beginning again. maybe because my last blog has been exposed TOO much, that not only my sisters started to comment here and there, but also 'dia' reads my last 2 blogs that i specifically wrote about him. (awak jahat!)

aaaaa... malunye..... =$

my friend asked me, then what's the reason u r blogging if it's not to be read by others? hurm.. it is easy. not all the things u do is to satisfied others. aku blajar gitar bukan utk perform or hiburkan org lain, tp utk kepuasan diri sendri. so the same principal is applied here. i think so la.. huhu. (so please, jgn mtk 'yuna celop' nih buat persembahan kat health camp johor nanti. pliz, tengkiu.)

btw, life been very hectic lately.dengan risec itu ini, attachment sana sini. juga banyak masalah. juga amat kopak. juga sangat penat. juga rindu shadid. >,<

ayoyoyo~